Are friends as important as family?

Published by Alison Wem on

Family are given to you but friends you get the opportunity to choose.

Family often love you unconditionally and stay with you throughout your life.

Friends often stay for a period in your life and then drift away. However I have noticed really close friends stay for the duration.

Some friendships are as close and as strong as a blood tie. They can be based on a common interest or less obvious things like the same sense of humour, life values or the joy of giving and receiving.

The picture of the three flowers represent me and my two closet friends.

  • I am the pink orchid on the right.
  • Sue, the flower in the middle is a lovely vibrant red as she loves being with and helping people to feel safe, secure and happy in their lives.
  • Jan is the flower on the left. She is tall, slim and gracious. Always positive about life and living, she encourages us to be our best selves and to enjoy life.

Sue is often the link person between Jan and me. In fact she introduced me to Jan. We met when we were teenagers and were discovering boys….. We became firm friends and have always laughed a lot and had fun. Together we have been young wives, mums, pursued careers and now we are waiting to become grandmas.

Nothing has changed the closeness of our friendship in the 40 years we have known each other.

If you look closely at the flowers none of them are perfect. We have each had our challenges but we have laughed and cried our way together through them.

Jan and I were unexpectedly widowed in our early 40s while our children were still quite young. Sue was there for us being our rock when we felt there was nothing in life to laugh about.

I am grateful for my friends and thank them for accompanying me through the journey of life. I feel we are true spiritual friends and we will be together always.

Hit comment and tell me your story of friendship. 

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Finding Calm: Practical Spiritual Tools to Manage Stress for Men

Many men today face a fast-paced world where stress and anxiety can easily take a toll on their mental and physical well-being. Juggling demanding careers, family responsibilities, and personal goals often leaves little room for genuine relaxation. While stress is inevitable, there are spiritual practices that can help you manage it effectively, creating a more robust, calmer foundation for handling life’s challenges.

Meditation: Finding Peace Amidst Chaos

Meditation may seem intimidating at first, but it’s one of the most effective tools for reducing stress and anxiety. Think of it as a pause button for your mind – a way to give yourself a break from constant mental chatter. Meditation doesn’t require a complicated routine; just five or ten minutes daily in a quiet space is enough to start.

Start by sitting comfortably, closing your eyes, and focusing on your breathing. Let your thoughts come and go without trying to control them. The goal isn’t to “stop” thinking but to allow thoughts to pass without getting caught up in them. This practice helps you observe your mind without reacting, which builds resilience and mental clarity. Over time, meditation can become a reliable anchor in moments of stress, grounding you and helping you find inner peace.

Breathwork: Releasing Tension with Intentional Breathing

Breathwork is another powerful tool for stress management. Many people tend to breathe shallowly when they’re stressed, which only heightens anxiety. Practicing slow, deep breathing calms the mind and tells the body it’s safe to relax.

Try the “4-7-8” technique: inhale for four counts, hold for seven, and exhale for eight. This pattern relaxes the nervous system, reduces tension, and creates a quick sense of calm. Practicing this technique regularly, especially in high-stress situations, can help you handle challenges with a clear head and steady nerves.

Mindfulness: Staying Grounded in the Present

Mindfulness is simply about being fully present. Often, stress comes from worrying about the past or future, but mindfulness brings you back to what’s right in front of you. It’s about focusing on the here and now without judgment.

Try incorporating mindfulness into your daily routine. For instance, if you’re drinking coffee, take a moment to savour the aroma and taste. If you’re working, focus on the task at hand without letting your mind wander. Engaging fully with your surroundings and actions helps reduce anxiety, making you feel more in control and less overwhelmed.

Physical Activity as a Form of Release

While exercise might not seem like a spiritual practice, physical movement can be grounding and healing. Activities like yoga, hiking, or even a simple walk outdoors connect you to your body and help release pent-up energy. Exercise reduces stress hormones and boosts
endorphins, helping you feel more balanced.

Finding Your Spiritual Routine

Managing stress and anxiety isn’t about following a rigid routine. It’s about exploring what resonates with you and creating a set of practices that fit your lifestyle. Maybe it’s a few minutes of meditation in the morning, breathwork during a busy workday, or mindfulness in daily activities. These small moments can make a big difference.

Remember, building a stress-resistant life takes time and patience. Investing in these spiritual practices will create a foundation of inner peace, clarity, and resilience, helping you handle whatever life brings.

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Resilience for Real Life: Practical Tools to Stay Strong and Grounded

When life throws challenges your way—whether it’s work stress, personal setbacks, or unexpected changes, building resilience can make all the difference. Resilience isn’t about forcing yourself through tough times; it’s about cultivating an inner strength that helps you bounce back and grow.

For men navigating high-pressure situations, spiritual practices like meditation, mindfulness, and breathwork can offer powerful tools to support that resilience and build lasting mental and emotional strength. Yet many men don’t take advantage of these tools. Stop for a moment and listen to the suggestions below.

Meditation: A Moment of Stillness to Recharge

Meditation might seem like a stretch if you’re new to it, but think of it as a practical reset for your mind. In the midst of a demanding day, even five or ten minutes of meditation can bring a sense of calm and clarity. This simple practice creates space where you can pause, let go of distractions, and refocus on what matters most.

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To get started, find a quiet spot, close your eyes, and focus on your breath. Let your mind settle, noticing thoughts as they arise without getting pulled into them. With each breath, you’re becoming calmer and more focused. As you breath out you let go of whatever no longer serves you, helping you handle life’s demands with a little more ease and resilience. This short exercise is also good for your blood pressure.

Mindfulness: Staying in the Present

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Mindfulness doesn’t have to take a lot of time. You can practice it anytime, anywhere – whether you’re working, exercising, or even just enjoying a meal. Focus on the experience itself, noticing the details and sensations. Staying present like this builds a steady, grounded mindset that can help you navigate challenges with confidence and clarity.

Breathwork: Taking Control of Stress

Your breath is a powerful tool for managing stress, and specific breathwork techniques can quickly bring calm and balance into any stressful situation. When pressure mounts, it’s easy to fall into shallow, fast breathing, which only adds to the tension. By practicing deep, controlled breathing, you can stay grounded, even when things get tough.

Try the “4-7-8” breathing technique: inhale for a count of four, hold for seven, and exhale for eight. It only takes a few rounds to feel a shift in your stress levels, helping you regain focus and stay in control. Just three deep breaths can make you feel very different.

Building a Routine That Fits

Building resilience doesn’t mean you need a complicated routine. It’s about finding simple practices that resonate with you and fit into your life. Try different approaches to see what works best – a short meditation in the morning, a mindful break during the day, or breathwork to settle your nerves when stress spikes. Over time, you’ll have a tool kit to support you through any challenge, helping you build a deeper sense of resilience and inner strength.

When life gets challenging, these practices are here to help you stay grounded, resilient, and ready for whatever comes next.

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As men reach their 40s and 50s, many seek deeper meaning and purpose in life. This stage, often called “midlife,” can be a time of transformation, offering the opportunity to reflect and grow spiritually.

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Many spiritual articles focus on a female audience with little guidance or encouragement for men. Their perspective on life can be different from women. This article aims to guide men, but it can equally address the needs of women to understand how spirituality affects men in their lives.

Embracing the Midlife Transition

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Spirituality can offer a guiding light through this process. Like the moon’s cycles, this phase of life invites men to embrace new opportunities for growth by letting go of outdated expectations and exploring new spiritual practices.

The Call for Inner Reflection

Midlife is the perfect time to slow down and engage in inner reflection. Practices like meditation, journaling, or time in nature help quiet the mind, allowing deeper desires and purpose to emerge. These spiritual practices support the shift from external focus to internal exploration, opening the door to self-discovery.

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Finding Purpose through Service

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Letting Go of Old Definitions of Success

Midlife brings a need to redefine success. Success has long been tied to career accomplishments, financial security, or status for many men. But as these external markers lose their appeal, it’s essential to shift toward a more personal definition of success, one focused on being present, living authentically, and pursuing deeper meaning.

Stepping into Your New Chapter

Finding purpose in midlife is about embracing a journey, not reaching a final destination. Spiritual growth during this stage invites you to reconnect with your inner self, let go of old expectations, and discover what truly brings meaning to your life. You can step into this new chapter with a renewed sense of purpose through spiritual practices, reflection, and service to others.

Midlife is not an end, but a beginning – a profound opportunity to discover peace and purpose in your life’s journey.