Finding the courage to lead the life you desire

Are you fed-up or dissatisfied with your life?

The choices you make today give you the life you experience tomorrow and onwards. Sometimes it takes courage to make the choices you know that are right for you.

Perhaps your decision involves walking away from someone or something which is alright but not great for you. If it was really bad, you probably wouldn’t find it difficult but this grey in- between area is much more difficult. What if I walk away from my partner but never find love again? Thoughts can race around your head and make you miserable. read more

I feel so alone….

When life is really challenging, sometimes we can feel really alone. Typically, this is at times of change. Most commonly this is as a result of one of the three Ds – divorce, debt and death. Sadly, more than one of these can happen at the same time.

How do you cope when you feel very alone with a big challenge, like one of the 3 Ds?

Your greatest friend and guide at times like this is your soul. Many people don’t realise they are in contact with their soul. I spoke to mine for years not realising who he was. read more

Is kindness worth the effort?

When I was growing up, I used to play with a small group of girls who lived nearby. Generally, we all got on and we played happily together. After the long summer holidays together, perhaps we had spent too much time together and one of us would say or do something unkind.

When I used to go running to my mum upset, she did not say – oh you poor thing. Instead, she used to ask me to imagine how that person must feel inside to be so unkind. I should feel grateful that I didn’t feel like that.

A little kindness can go a long way. read more

Stay in the flow of life to guide your spiritual path

Control is probably the last thing many of us would want to let go of. By having control and being in charge of your life or a situation brings a sense of more certainty. But does it?

Are you allowing the right people and things into your life?

I am dyslexic and forget things very easily. Being highly planned and structured helps me get through the day. I don’t have to remember where the car keys are if I always put them in the same place. When I married my husband and he came to live with us, my life seemed totally chaotic. He is the opposite to me and just dumps the car keys anywhere! read more

Betrayal: can you recover from it or will you always carry the hurt?

Betrayal can be a hard life challenge to handle and to recover from. It can go straight to your heart and make you feel unheard and/or abandoned. It can have such an impact on you, you may feel like a vulnerable small child.

A betrayal can be from a long time ago but you might still be carrying the hurt. If the hurt is deep enough, it can appear as a physical pain or illness. Often doctors can find no cause for the pain. Yet you are still feeling it.

It is never too late to take action. You can heal and reclaim a part of your lovely self. It is yours to own and enjoy. read more

Dying: the farewell

Since the day we were born, all of us are destined to die. As you draw into old age, you may wish to review your life and all of its ups and downs. Or you may decide to do this at an earlier time in your life. Here is some guidance you may like to consider.

  • Don’t have regrets for the things that have not gone well. We all have them. Decide what you would do differently if you were faced with the same choices again. This is how you learn and grow. A learning is never a waste for your soul even if you learn it with your last breath.
  • Be kind to yourself. We often accept the views of that critical voice inside, your ego. Your soul is much kinder and more loving. It is surprisingly objective and comes with wisdom when reviewing the life challenges you have had to deal with. Listen to the loving, kind voice rather than the critical one.
  • Be grateful for the opportunities to learn you have been given in this lifetime. You may or may not have got things right or the outcome you desired. But perhaps you have learnt hard lessons, such as how to handle disappointment in a gracious way. Or learnt to remain positive and hopeful as something better will arrive. Even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time of disappointment.

Perhaps the hardest farewell is when someone knows they are terminally ill.

When I am ill, I always say to myself – never mind, you will feel a little better tomorrow. How hard it must be to know it will not be the case for you and yet still enjoy life. Some people do manage this hardest of tasks. Perhaps they have learnt or found the wisdom, it is not about the quantity of life but rather the quality of it. read more

Pride: is it good or bad?

Pride is the feeling you get of pleasure or satisfaction when you or someone you love has achieved something. It is perhaps that sense of pride when your child has had the courage to stand-up in front of the school and read a poem. You know how challenging that is to your child but they succeeded in doing it. I can see you clapping your hands with a big smile on your face.

With a positive connotation, pride is a sense of contentment or happiness towards your own life choices and actions or those of someone you are close to you. read more