How do you cope with one of the 3 Ds: divorce, death, debt?

Published by Alison Wem on

Need help to cope with life’s challenges? You may need some on-going practices to help you with life which develops your insight into yourself and your behaviours plus boost your personal calmness. Beyond being successful at work, these practices can help you to feel more alive, happy and healthy in your life.  Do you need some help with achieving this?

You need a Soul Map!

For me, that realisation came in the early hours one night as, newly widowed and with children and a demanding job as a CIO, I confronted my anguish – and found not chaos and more pain but a space of calmness and route to strength and guidance.

Create your own Soul Map through easy to do steps for personal development. A soul map is a route to finding your own personal calmness and wisdom through understanding the relationships and life lessons in your life. A life lesson might be learning to listen or defining your personal boundaries or having patience. You can learn techniques to know yourself better and to build your personal calmness so you can work more effectively at work and at home.

Find your personal calmness at the centre of your storm

Perhaps you have hit one of life’s 3 Ds – death, divorce/separation, debt. These challenges are all about learning through the loss of someone or something you value. Identifying your life lessons will help you to cope with your life challenges. This personal development is about identifying the life lessons you are learning with the important people in your life – your partner, family, manager, friends and neighbours.

Your Soul Map is a visual representation of you and your life; Choosing a template to colour, you paint the geometric shapes. No artistic skills required. This colouring relaxes the ever-active mind and enables you to;

Re-connect with your personal strength, wisdom, and calmness.

Templates are available at Free soul map templates

Book an appointment with Alison Wem for intuitive life guidance, creative therapy or mediumship.  Available face-to-face or via Skype depending on location.

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Your Soul Family

Your Peaceful Place: Designing a Sacred Space at Home

Constant noise and distractions seem to be the norm of the 21st century. I really notice the difference when I return to London after being in the rural countryside. This has led me to believe creating a sacred space at home is essential for nurturing your spiritual well-being. Many women value a peaceful environment; a personal sanctuary can bring balance and inner calm. Whether you have an entire room or just a small corner, a sacred space is where you can retreat and recharge.

Here’s how to create your own sacred space to support your spiritual journey and promote inner peace.

Choose Your Space Wisely

You don’t need a large area, but the space should be somewhere you feel comfortable and undisturbed. A quiet corner in your bedroom, a nook by the window, or even a section of your garden can work perfectly. Focus on an area that feels safe, calm, and inviting.

Natural light can enhance the atmosphere, so choose a spot with soft lighting if possible. If not, use gentle artificial lighting to create a warm, peaceful ambiance.

Clear and Cleanse the Space

Start by decluttering your chosen area. An uncluttered space invites a clear, calm mind. Once the physical space is cleared, cleanse it energetically. You can use sage, palo santo, or incense to purify the air and set the tone for peace and healing. If you are unable to do this, you can clear a space energetically by clapping your hands.

While cleansing, set an intention for the space. Whether for inner peace, healing, or spiritual growth, your space will hold the energy you infuse into it.

Bring in Elements of Nature

Incorporating nature helps ground your space. You can add plants, crystals, seashells, or stones, anything that connects you to the earth. Each of these elements brings its own energy. Plants purify the air, while crystals can offer specific healing properties, depending on your needs.

Select items that resonate with you and create a sense of peace and harmony. I like to change these items with the seasons. The autumn has arrived in the UK. As the leaves on the trees change to wonderful colours, I will definitely be making use of them in my sacred space.

Create Comfort and Warmth

Comfort is vital in your sacred space. Add cushions, soft blankets, or a meditation pillow to create a cozy environment. Choose seating that fits how you intend to use the space, whether it’s for meditation, journaling, or quiet reflection.

Candles can also enhance the sense of warmth. Beeswax or essential oil-infused candles are ideal, and lighting one can mark the start of your sacred time.

Personalise Your Space

This is your sanctuary, so personalise it with items that are meaningful to you. Add spiritual symbols, personal mementos, or artwork that inspires and uplifts you. You might include a small altar with objects representing what you wish to invite into your life – peace, love, or clarity.

Use Your Space with Intention

The power of your sacred space comes from using it regularly. Whether for meditation, yoga, or simple moments of silence, make it a habit to retreat there daily. Set an intention each time you enter, aligning the space’s energy with your spiritual goals.

Creating a sacred space at home is a simple yet powerful way to nurture your inner peace. You’ll create a sanctuary that supports your spiritual well-being by choosing a space, cleansing it, adding natural elements, and using it intentionally.

Nature

Embracing Eco-Friendly Living with Spiritual Wisdom

Climate change is a growing global concern, with the effects of the change increasingly being felt in the UK and other countries. Rising temperatures, extreme weather events, and environmental challenges demand urgent attention. While much focus is on scientific and policy-driven solutions, the spiritual dimension of caring for the Earth is equally important. Many spiritual traditions call for environmental stewardship, emphasizing humanity’s responsibility to protect and care for our planet. It is a sacred place for all who live on Earth.

Spiritual Roots of Environmental Stewardship

Across numerous faiths, the Earth is seen as sacred, and humans are regarded as its stewards. In the Christian Bible, Genesis speaks of humans being asked to “tend and keep” the Earth. This calls for responsible use of natural resources and care for the environment for future generations.

Islam promotes a similar idea, with humans seen as khalifas (stewards) of the Earth. The Quran advocates for maintaining balance and caring for the environment, viewing the Earth as a sacred trust that must be respected and preserved.

Buddhism also emphasizes non-harming (ahimsa) as a core principle that extends to all living beings, including the environment. Buddhist teachings encourage compassion, mindfulness, and ethical action as ways to address the suffering caused by environmental destruction.

Whatever your faith, you all have a part to play in caring for the Earth so it might thrive and future generations can have a joyful place to live, work, and play.

Accepting the interdependency between all living beings 

This approach sees the Earth as a living, interconnected system, aligning with the teachings of many Indigenous traditions that view nature as sacred. Individuals are encouraged to develop a deep understanding of how humanity affects the environment and to commit to protecting and preserving the natural world. We are a part of, not separate from, the natural world. How we choose to live affects all around us. Not just humans but every aspect of Nature.

Spiritual Teachings and Climate Action

Spiritual teachings offer both comfort and motivation for climate action. As climate change worsens, many faiths emphasise the moral imperative to act. The Pope urges global action on climate change while addressing its disproportionate impact on the poor. Those with limited resources will find it challenging to thrive on a planet experiencing climate change. The weather’s reliability is called into question making the growing of food in the required quantity less certain.

People in the UK are also increasingly advocating for environmental sustainability. These groups often focus on practical actions, such as reducing waste, conserving water, and advocating for renewable energy, encouraging individuals and communities to make ecologically conscious choices.

A Call to Collective Responsibility

At its heart, environmental stewardship is a collective spiritual responsibility. Many traditions, whether through religious teachings or personal spiritual practice, remind us that the Earth is a gift that must be cherished and protected. The interconnectedness of life calls for respect, care, and action to preserve the environment for future generations.

The fight against climate change is not just a scientific challenge but a moral and spiritual one, calling on humanity to act as true stewards of the Earth.

Your Soul Family

How do I help my children to thrive in this changing world

Our children are often the dearest people in our hearts. We put a lot of time and effort into raising them. We want to know that they can have a good life ahead of them. No matter the age of your children, you never stop being a parent and wanting the best for them.

What can a parent do to help safe-guard their children?

By the nature of living in a changing world, the greatest gift for your child to not only survive within it but to thrive, is being flexible. Careers and jobs are no longer for life. Everyone expects to change them in a life time with a possible geographic move thrown in as well. Technology is moving fast and impacting our lives. Those who do not adopt it and take the best from it, are in danger of being left behind.

Are you being a good role model on flexibility?

While children are growing up, they tend to love routines and structure. These may well be useful and practical for maintaining a family schedule for times to eat and go to bed. But it is also useful to teach your children that changing the schedule is good if it leads to a better place or their environment necessitates it.

This is sometimes easier said than done. My son as a child loved his familiar routine. If we went on holiday, he would not change either the time to eat or sleep. It was a nightmare when we might want to stay out later to enjoy an evening walk or a meal. However, I do feel I brought this on myself. When it was just him and me at home, our lives ran better when we followed a schedule. When his baby sister arrived, we did not have this luxury. I still had to take and collect my son from school. The baby had to learn to wait for a feed or to sleep in her push chair if our family schedule necessitated it. My observation is my daughter grew up coping with being flexible more than my son.

As parents you want to warn your children of the inherent dangers in life. You may encourage them not to talk to strangers when they are little. When they grow older you warn them not to drink too much, to study and work hard, to manage their money carefully.

In all of this there is a danger you make your children fearful. It is important that they remain as curious about the world around them as they were as a baby and toddler.

There is a fine line between following your curiosity and safety

Curiosity keeps you engaged in the world and therefore informed on what may be upcoming in the future. With an understanding of upcoming changes, your children get the chance to consider what it will mean to them and to seek the benefits but mitigate the negatives. This gives them time to prepare and adapt to the changes.

An example of this today maybe Artificial Intelligence (AI). There is much fear around this topic from the risk of it being abused by powerful people and institutions. If this should happen, many people could be impacted negatively. However, used appropriately AI can bring many advantages to every day people like you and me.

If all fails, being resilient will help your children to get through any change that faces them. They may have a life plan of what they want to do, but they should be open to changing it. This can be rapid and significant if it is needed. No-one knows what these changes will be. But being able to ride the change is key to surviving and thriving in a new environment.

The conversations about being flexible, remaining curious and being resilient begin in childhood. However, it is my belief that the most important conversations happen in young adulthood and going forwards. As I said earlier, you never stop being a parent.

Of course, to be qualified to help your children as adults, you need to be all of these things yourself. It will not assist them if you use the rhetoric;

in my day……